God Is Answering My Prayers… So Why Am I Still Scared?

 

Answered Prayers… And Still Nervous

You’d think once prayer starts working and life smooths out a little, faith would get easier.

It doesn’t.

If anything… it gets tested in a quieter way.

Prayer has been helping. I pray multiple times every morning. After my shower, with my coffee, even pausing while I’m reading just to talk to God. All before I walk out the door for work.

And I can feel the difference.

Work has been smoother. My mindset is better. I’ve been more at peace instead of constantly stressed.

I’ve also been working on my health for the past few years. The weight loss has been steady. Not perfect, but consistent. I know I could push harder with exercise… but like most people, I fall back on the excuse: “I’m running out of time.”

So yes, things are improving.

But that doesn’t mean the fear is gone.

I’ve got a heart procedure coming up. Another ablation. The Watchman implant for my AFib. And if we’re being real… anything involving your heart gets your attention real fast.

I’ve been dealing with heart issues since I was 38. I’ve got stents, including one in the widow maker. So this isn’t new… but it still hits.

And a lot of that fear goes deeper.

I lost my dad when I was young. Junior high. He was 55 after his second heart attack.

I’m 54 right now.

So yeah… that’ll get in your head a little.

Because I look at my life, and I see my kids… my grandkids… and I think about everything he missed. And everything I don’t want to miss.

I love my family more than anything. More than air itself.

So when I say I have faith… but I’m still nervous… that’s real.

Faith isn’t just for bad days.

It’s for uncertain ones too.

It’s actually harder to trust God when things are going okay than when you’re desperate. When life is falling apart, you run to Him. No hesitation.

But when things start improving?

That’s when people slowly drift.

They start thinking, “I got this now.”

And that’s usually when things fall apart again.

I’ve learned I can’t do that.

God has to stay front and center. Not just when I need Him… but when things are going well too.

And I’m getting better at that.

Not perfect. Not even close.

But better.

That’s where I’m at right now.

Making progress… but not “fixed.”

Faithful… but still feeling fear.

Grateful… and anxious at the same time.

Some days that feels like a mess.

But that’s real life.

Faith isn’t pretending everything is perfect.

It’s choosing to trust God while everything isn’t.

Because the truth is… God has already shown up for me.

That’s not opinion. That’s fact.

Things are better. I’m more at peace. Life isn’t as heavy as it was.

But I’m still nervous about this procedure.

And honestly? That doesn’t mean my faith is weak.

It means I’m human.

So I keep doing what I know to do.

I pray.

I take care of my health.

I stay grounded.

I give God control… even when I want to take it back.

Philippians 4:6-7 NLT

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

And I pray for the surgeon too.

Because at the end of the day, I don’t just want skilled hands.

I want God guiding them.

That’s where my trust has to be.

Not in how I feel… but in who God is.

So if you’re reading this and you believe, I’d appreciate your prayers.

And if you don’t… I still appreciate the support.

But I’ll leave you with this thought:

What do you really have to lose by believing?

Because if God is real… you gain everything.

And if He’s not… you lose nothing.

Either way… I’m choosing to trust Him.

Isaiah 40:31 NLT

But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.